health

Unexplained Anger

So listen.  There are perfectly legitimate reasons to get angry.

My work situation, in the past, has consisted of escalating levels of stupidity that would enrage even the most enlightened of souls, if they felt any responsibility at all toward their post and the overall well-being of the company, its customers and the co-workers around them.

I do.  It’s weird, because I’m not proactively charitable, but I suffer from an unfortunate level of empathy.  Indeed, empathy is good, but when other people I know who have a high level of compassion come into contact with people who are suffering, they too suffer to an extreme extent.

It’s not an admirable trait, but it is.  I’d rather be empathetic than not, but strong collective suffering, like an angst-ridden workforce or a near-civil-war nation such as our neighbours to the south, can bring out a great deal of existential pain.

Add to that the fact that I’m very likely pre-diabetic and shit can go downhill in a hurry.

So yes, there are reasons to be angry, but I’ve spent years cultivating ways to channel or release said anger.  I didn’t have good outlets for it for many years, and as a result, put it into drinking.  However, and I believe this is diet-related, these days, none of these seem to work, save for a chocolate bar or a glass of orange juice.

It’s bizarre how by 10:30 in the morning, I can be losing it, then by the time I get back from lunch, perfectly fine.  Then by 4, losing it again.  It’s so consistent and can in all probability (though I’m not actively tracking it), correlate it with what I’ve eaten or how I’ve slept, and that sort of thing.

Is it possible that all of my issues with anger and depression, which I’ve suffered from since the usual angsty teenage years, be the result of poor diet?

The only way to know for sure is to adopt a diet that controls all that, but I need a functional way to measure blood sugar first.  Without that, it’s impossible to know for sure if the two correlate, or if what I’m doing is working, or just coincidence.

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