I remember thinking, “This is it. This is the day I gave up. The day I stop trying forever.” It was like an out-of-body experience, or some weird flash forward, to a day when I’m old and gray, angry and disappointed with the fate to which I’d resigned myself. There I was, wrinkled and beaten, …
Back On The Horse
So, I lost about ten days there. I wish I could say what happened. Burnout, depression, the impositions of the real world? All of it, really. I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I told myself I was having difficulties connecting with the work. I started seriously considering another idea far too large to contemplate …
Dying Off-Screen
I find it strange when characters die off-screen. Maybe it’s the genre fiction I read or the comics I grew up with, but for me, if you don’t see the body, the person isn’t dead. At least, that’s how it feels. Sometimes, I understand it. Given why The Ranch had to part with Danny Masterson, …
Sidetracked
I ask a lot of myself. Probably too much. I mentioned before about the folly of taking on too much and assuming the possibilities open to me to impact this world are beyond anything I could ever hope to achieve. Would it be a surprise to know my “to read” list is almost 2500 books …
Illnesses And Assholes
I used to be the type who believed you went to work sick. In fact, I still believe that. Unless you’re actively puking or shitting, you go. Part of that is the number of individuals I know who will just randomly call in sick to play video games or spend the day jerking off. Or …
Wattpad
I decided to set up a Wattpad account. I know the more traditional route is to submit to publishers and agents and online magazines and that sort of thing, which I’ve done, but traction is difficult and my social media following is meager. From what my sister-in-law tells me about the industry, being a writer …
Requiem For A Doormat Reading List
I read a lot. Way too much, probably. Books, comics, television, movies, music – it doesn’t really matter, I love a good story, but books trump all. Well, maybe not comics. I read too many comics to list them all here, but I actually track books on Goodreads. I finish every book for one reason …
Process And Expansion
I have a tendency to cripple myself by taking on too much. When I was young, I saw my genius spreading out like a spark in a void that fuels a new big bang, to eventually encompass all that is. Grandiose, sure, but that wasn’t hyperbole. I assumed that it was possible to actually convert …
Submissions
Today is the day. I’ve spent a couple of weeks away from the whole “depression epic” that is Requiem For A Doormat and I feel that it’s time to send this puppy into the world. Like a parent dropping its child off at college (or perhaps more appropriately, leaving them at kindergarten), I’m leaving this …
Cortisol
I got 80 in biology in grade 9. That sounds decent, but even though I may later have gotten worse marks in other things, I would label biology my worst subject. I could never have been a doctor or a vet. It’s not that viscera bothers me. I went weirdly serene when my daughter split …